SAGGY AWARDS

The SAG (as in Screen Actors Guild) Awards on Saturday might just as well have been called the SAGGY Awards judging by the unfortunate bodice on Tina Fey’s Prabal Gurung gown, which did her ta-tas no favours. The red colour looked great on Fey; the dress not so much. Fey is not exactly overly endowed in the bosom department and the top kept pleating and puckering and pancaking her breasts. Her stylist should have inserted a chicken cutlets bra. 

Fey and BFF Amy Poehler presented the legendary Carol Burnett with the 2016 Lifetime Achievement Award. Burnett looked wonderful except for her helmet-head hairdo, which was exactly like William H. Macy’s. Surely there was a hairdresser in the house who could have fluffed Burnett’s ‘do up a notch.

There was certainly a lot of tinsel in Tinseltown that night. Nicole Kidman looked a hot mess in a pink glittery gown by Gucci. It was a pile-on of pale palettes, making her look anemic. Alicia Vikander totally outshone her in a spangled Mondrian-esque creation by Louis Vuitton.

The best dressed of the night hands-down was Kate Winslet in a dazzling hunter-green gown by Armani which hugged her in all the right places. Winslet is both womanly and willowy and has been known to eat a burger and keep it down. What’s going on with Demi Moore, the last presenter of the night? She is so painfully thin she could be vying for the Karen Carpenter Memorial Award. Seriously, give this girl a sandwich and while you are at it, take one over to skeletal Rooney Mara.

Leonardo DiCaprio is rapidly becoming the eminence grise of Hollywood and he is only 41. He could be the new Brando circa Godfather. All he needs is a pinkie ring to kiss.

Amy Poehler and Tina Fey flank honoree Carol Burnett at the "SAGGY Awards"